I didn’t want to talk about it

~ but now I will ~


I lost my good friend Buddy last month.  He was thirteen almost to the day.

We hiked together, when we were younger,  took walks together when we got older, and for the past year he was always at my side; followed me everywhere.  He wouldn’t be separated from me no matter how many times I changed rooms, but with a difference lately.  He didn’t follow me outside, because he didn’t want to go up and down the steps unless absolutely necessary.

Pain meds helped for a while, but then he stopped following me inside and had begun to not even greet Bob at the door when he got home. Then he couldn’t keep his food down.

It was time.

Writing this brings tears to my eyes.  The house has been too quiet without him padding by my side each and every day.  So while some would be amazed at what I did yesterday, maybe even shocked, I went out and found a new friend to keep me company.  He walks by my side from room to room, follows me out on my chores, though I will not let him in with the chickens or the geese.  Not safe.  Without further explanation:

Meet Walker!

Look at those speckled feet!

He is a rescue pup I found through  A New Leash On Life.  I tried to pick a totally different kind of dog.  I really did!  Yet, I ended up with one that, at least as a two month pup, looks very like Buddy.  The big difference will be when he grows up.  Buddy was Lab and Border Collie  (very fluffy), and Walker is Hound and possibly Lab, so short hair.

The exciting bits of new puppy ownership are: Puppy breath (apparently I’m not the only one who thinks it’s grand);  Wiggles and puppy licks;  and, The need for constant motion until you just drop (as above).

The not so exciting bits of new puppies?  Chewing, house training, chewing, and did I mention House training!?  I think we are making something in the way of progress, because this morning after telling him very loudly and for the third time,


He actually stopped and ran for the back door where he sat and waited for me to take him out to finish the deed.

This too shall pass ❤

It wasn’t me!

More to come!


39 thoughts on “I didn’t want to talk about it

  1. tialys says:

    Lynda I’m so sorry to hear about your best Buddy but I absolutely understand why you went and got another dog – and a rescue, well done you. We have always had more than one dog and we’ve often said that, when you lose one – as we did last year, also aged 13 – it’s heartbreaking but when you have another dog (or two) your routine doesn’t change much. You still have to go for walks, give treats, have regular feeding times and all those doggy things that take make up a dog owner’s day. If you only have one dog it actually changes your life when they go – what can you possibly do with all that extra time?
    Walker looks gorgeous – he has speckly feet like my Flo has – and all that house training and inappropriate chewing will soon become a memory.
    Enjoy your new friend. He’ll never replace Buddy but he will find his own place in your heart and make new memories for you.

    • Lynda says:

      Thank you, Lynn. Walker is putting me through my paces, and I am in turn putting him through his. I can’t believe how what a quick study he is! He knows sit, but not stay. He knows “NO” and thankfully, listens. He comes, almost always, and is getting used to walking on the leash. OK, he doesn’t like the leash, but he isn’t sitting and letting me pull him around on the wood floors in the house! He did that once and immediately got up and walked when we hit the rug. Now he just walks with me. He is going to be a good companion. 😉

  2. kathyreeves says:

    Lynda, it is so hard to put a dog down, even when you know that is the kind thing to do. The last time that happened at home, even the vet cried a few tears, our Andy was such a dog. I dread Max getting that old, but Walker proves that life is indeed a circle, and I am certain that your Buddy would be pleased that you are being well guarded. Hugs!

    • Lynda says:

      Kathy, it is hard! So hard. Each of the pets we have owned we have told ourselves we will know when it is time. And each pet has probably been around a bit longer than we should have put them through. But it was Tucker, Buddy’s little companion, that really brought that home to us. He had Cushings and Diabetes and we really were selfish in our need to keep him with us. It was only after he was gone and we looked objectively at his photos that we could then see how poorly he was doing. This time we were (a bit) wiser and knew it was time. Thank you, Kathy.

  3. claire93 says:

    oh Lynda! so sorry to hear about Buddy but hey, 13 years old! he had a very full doggie life with you and you knew when it was time, to save him from pain and lingering.
    As for the arrival of Walker . . . that just goes to say what a great dog Buddy was, that you feel your home isn’t complete without a dog. Walker will never replace Buddy but he’ll bring you joy in his own way.
    We have always had just one dog at a time, and have always lept right back in with a new dog, after the death of the previous one. I honestly think it helps with the grieving process – a new dog keeps you extremely busy, and makes sure you don’t get out of the routine of walks etc.

    • Lynda says:

      Claire, thank you. I still get misty eyed looking at his photo or when not seeing him in his favorite napping spots. But I can’t stay there for long with Walker around! He is keeping me busy and I love that he, like Buddy, Walker is following me everywhere!

      We have been a two dog home since we started keeping dogs, because in the beginning we were off at work and wanted them to have a playmate during our away time. Bob’s dog is Noodle, a Jack Russel/Rat terrier mix. I’m the keeper of big dogs. But actually, it was Bob who wanted to wait… and I could not bear it. As Noodle sees it, I am here, but not his playmate. Interestingly, he has stepped in and is putting the pup in his place and showing him the ropes. Last night at dinner they were both becoming too animated, so I gave a loud, stern LAY DOWN! Noodle went down immediately and Walker looked over at him and followed suit. I haven’t taught Walker that command yet. Smart puppy. 😀

      • claire93 says:

        well Noodle sounds like he’s going to be a good influence on Walker and I’m sure he is also pleased to have company, although he’ll probably find Walker has a bit too much energy lol

          • Deb Weyrich-Cody says:

            Oh my, ‘popcorn paws and puppy breath’ are two of my absolute favourite smells♥️ and so glad to hear you’ve found Walker to fill that gaping hole in your heart! How wonderful he’s got such a good teacher in Noodle, Lynda! Having an older dog to ‘lay down the law’ and teach when ‘enough is enough’ is such an asset for a puppy’s socialisation: ) Very happy for you🤗

  4. petspeopleandlife says:

    I am so sorry that you lost your sweet Buddy. It happens to all of us that love dogs and or cats. But, I will tell you one thing- you did the very thing that you should have done and that was to go out an get another dog for company and companionship You are honoring Buddy’s legacy and giving another homeless puppy a wonderful life. Congratulations. Oh yes, I think your pup has a bit of border collie and maybe a dab of pit or not. If you are inclined there is Wisdom panel which will tell you what your dog is made of. But, really breed compositions do not matter. The devotion and soul of the new puppy is what matters.

    • Lynda says:

      Hello Yvonne. Thank you for your kind words. I don’t know if I never mentioned it before, but with the exception of Tucker, all our dogs were of the rescued, mixed breed variety. I loved Tucker so much, but being a pure breed came with all sorts of maladies! He was the first and the last pedigreed pup for us. Now we go rescued, mixed breed all the way. And, funny enough, yesterday the vet told me the same thing about the Border Collie in Walker; right down to the white tip of his tail! ❤ I guess I just have a type, as Buddy was Border Collie and Lab mix. Border Collies are awesome dogs!

      • petspeopleandlife says:

        Thank you for your reply. Border collies are so smart and I love the breed- full blood or mixed, they are so smart and tend to be very devoted. I have had three BCs and now I have one full blood BC and one that is a mixed BC. But I have other dogs as well. All of my dogs I got from high kill shelters or were found by me as throw away dogs I think I remember that Tucker had Cushing’s but my memory might be faulty about that. I think your new dog is going to everything that you could possible want in a dog. May he live a long and healthy life.

    • Lynda says:

      Wildninja, do you know how right you are? Yesterday the vet told me that Walker is part Border Collie, and so was Buddy! Thank you, and I will have to agree with you on his being “… stinking cute!” I think I just have a type and home in on it instinctually. (more on that later 😀 )

  5. Deb says:

    I’m so glad you got another companion, it doesn’t replace Buddy at all , just adds to your life another love. I didn’t think I would ever get another Rottie after Molly had to be put to sleep because of cancer but then Caroline needed a good home,and I’m ever so glad to have her in my life! Potting train..I always hated that part whether dog or child.😄

    • Lynda says:

      Deb he is certainly keeping me busy! Poor fella, when I have to get some chores done then I have to put him on a lead in the studio (when I’m here) or if in another part of the house then into his crate… Keeps him from getting into trouble, and I can get a bit of work done. I have also had to resort to setting the timer for an hour when it is a big job so that both he and I can take a little break with each other. LOL, this also means that neither he, nor I get bored! 😀

  6. shoreacres says:

    Making the best decision for a pet that’s come to the end of its life is so hard — but you did the best thing for Buddy, and that’s what counts. And what a cutie you’ve brought into your life! I had to laugh at the rainbow on the paper in the last photo. I’d say you’ve already found a new pot of gold — maybe that’s Buddy giving his stamp of approval.

    • Lynda says:

      Linda, thank you. Yes, Walker is a cutie… now, how long does it take for a new pup to get over chewing everything in sight? And I do mean EVERYTHING! Sigh, this too shall pass.

      Ha! That rainbow showing up in the photo wasn’t lost on me. ❤

  7. katechiconi says:

    I think a lot of nonsense is talked about not getting another dog straight away. There is a dog-shaped hole in your heart and your life and if you can bless a rescue dog with a loving home, I think it would be crazy to hold back. Walker is a great big cutie, I just want to pet those big paddy-paws

  8. Littlesundog says:

    Aw, Lynda, I’m so sorry about Buddy. I had watery eyes when I read this… I had no idea he was that old, and I remember his ever so slight pawing at my ankle (under the table) for attention. He wasn’t shy at all about asking for a little love. He was one of the sweetest dogs I’ve ever met. I know he was a gift in your life, Lynda.

    Of course you found Walker. You needed each other! Puppy breath?? You BETCHA!! 😀 The house in shreds and disarray? YES!! A house is for living in, and what is life without a lot of love? Hair, fur, feathers and all! I’m so happy for you!!

    • Lynda says:

      Lori, I’m not sure if I shared this with you at the time, but Buddy actually pined for you for a bit when you left. He searched the south end of the house every day for a while looking for you. You are the only person I know who could continually massage his big cranium nonstop, and He LOVED it! BTW, at Walker’s vet visit this Monday they told me he is also a Border Collie mix… I guess I instinctively have a “type”. I’ll blame it on Butch. More about him on another day… I promise. ❤

      • Littlesundog says:

        Yes, you told me Buddy missed me after I left. Goodness, who wouldn’t miss having your own massage person at any given moment! There was a real connection between us (just like you and me!). He was a special fella, Lynda. It felt like “home” when I visited, and Buddy was a big part of that comfort of home for me. I look forward to hearing more about Walker. When I saw the dappling on his legs and paws I thought of Border Collie as it’s an unusual trait found in some. My sister has a Border mix that has that same dappling. Walker is one lucky puppy… he’s found a loving home!

  9. lestersflat says:

    My husband will tell you I am also “guilty” of getting another dog “too soon” after losing one. We lost our first 2 dogs both at about 14 or 15 YO (not at the same time). Husband wasn’t really ready for another so quickly, but each time, I was the one who had a huge hole left in my house and my heart. There is no guilty or too soon or replacing the one you lost. When you give a dog a good life, and it is time for them to leave you, the right time is when you find the right dog. Walker is a beauty. Taking care of his puppiness will fill the holes in your heart and home.

    • Lynda says:

      Katy, I did sort of ‘tell’ bob I was getting a new pup, but they are fast friends now! And you are correct in saying that taking care of his puppiness has filled my heart… and all my time! LOL!

      I know that this too shall pass, but he is a world class chewer at the moment and nothing is sacred where his desire and little needle teeth are concerned. If I can’t keep my 👁️ on him, then he is leashed to my studio cutting table or in his crate while I clean house, etc. 😁

  10. Joanne S says:

    Quite understand. Our Phoebe Darling was 13, too. I was prostrate on the bathroom floor with a towel stuffed in mouth so as not to alarm the family. She was my first and sweetest pup. I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet friend, Buddy. Walker look very cute, sweet, entertaining – all silly puppy things! Good luck with the training bits.

    • Lynda says:

      I’m sorry to read this, Joanne. I think we want them to be there forever, but they aren’t. And because they are around for a good long time they become completely bonded to our hearts. It is hard to say goodbye. As for Walker, he is a silly puppy brain to be sure! I think I had quite forgotten how demanding they are with their energy and training needs! I think my Walker is like having a two year old bouncing beneath my feet all day! WHEW! LOL!

    • Lynda says:

      Thank you, PrimsNPretties. I am much better at talking about Buddy now; I don’t get misty eyed. And that little Walker is growing so fast! He is now 25 lbs and keeps me running after him most of the day. I don’t have time for being so sad each day. In fact, I haven’t even found time to blog for almost two weeks! 😉

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